Monday, October 17, 2005
tuned in;
take all those void feelings away from me. i`m living fine.
had dinner with my parents tonight and man, it sure felt good. it`s been AGES since i last sat down with both of them and have a proper meal together. and now that i`ve done that, i realized how much i missed it. how much i miss them. though it was a simple meal - steamboat at the coffee shop near my house, that little time spent together was extremely fruitful. (: i should do that more often.
it`s not often my practice to tell my parents i love them, and it sure won`t come naturally to me to do that. so i can only pen them here. i don`t need them to know outright. but i just love them both.
it`s going to be a packed week, not just because it`s my birthday. zoo ambassador duty this saturday which i`m not mentally prepared for and school`s reopening in about 2 weeks` time which also i`m not ready for since i'm too busy working my hearts out for this entire holidays. it was simply work, no rest. it`s hard to balance between work and play and let`s hope i`ll be able to do that once again for this following sem. but i made a silent promise to myself that i`ll work much less.
i`m only 18. it`s the time of my life.
i should be spending more time with my friends and family and quit thinking about earning cash all the time. being ambitious sure motivates me, but what`s most important at the end of my lifetime won`t be the amount that is left to be distributed in my bank account, but how many people were to cry when i die. negative as that may sound, i`m sure there'll also to be many people laughing when i die too, so i`m working on that too.
there are sure ways to make myself a more bearable person; a better person. and i`ll be learning. life`s too short to be wasted, what`s more when i want to be dead by the age of latest 6o. there`s far too many things to be accomplished within the remaining years of my life. time flies too fast. this year sped by like a bullet train, and i can`t take back any of the wrong words i said or any wrong gestures i did. too many things to be constantly reflected upon but too little time. poor time management skills adds to the problem.
turning 18, but i still need to be taught to live life to its fullest.
but at least i`m glad that i actually noticed.
like what many wise ones always advise
"you never miss something until you lose it; you never miss the water till the well runs dry."
11:02 PM
//ella habla; usted escucha
